Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Day 107 - Lesson 106

Let me be still and listen to the truth.

I needed this and that long walk today.  We are given exactly what we need right when we need it - whether we wish to recognize that to be true or not.

I have been feeling restless, worried, claustrophobic - and frustrated in thinking that I shouldn't be having these human feelings because I'm doing all of this good spiritual work.....right!?!

I was lamenting all this today on my walk with my very good friend.  She reminded me that it is April, a tumultuous month.  The weather can't decide what to do.  The moon is nearly full.  I am doing the studying and reflecting and practicing that I am meant to be doing.  She also reminded me that often times, when we feel such strong emotions it is a sign that something big or important is about to happen.  It's all in preparation for that next thing....whatever that next thing is. 

One of the things April has given me is ideas.  I seem to be full of ideas and thoughts - this is....well, I don't want to label it necessarily.  My head is full, it's overflowing actually.  This makes it more difficult for me to be still and, therefore, if I'm not still it's harder for me to listen.

I bought a sketch pad a few days ago.  I can't exactly explain the reason for it.  I don't draw very well and haven't even tried much.  One of my sisters is an amazing artist and she taught me how to draw a few cartoony type characters.  Anyway, a few times this past week, I sat down and just doodled and colored.  It did quiet my mind and it brought me a couple of poetic statements.  Not surprisingly, opening up an avenue I haven't regularly used in my life has provided a channel for creativity to appear.  It feels good.  

Today is the law of pure potentiality.  Pure potentiality!  In stillness I know my true self (Deepak Chopra).
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