Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Day 135 - Lesson 134

Let me perceive forgiveness as it is.

This is one of those lessons that I think I 'get' but at the same time I'm not completely sure that I do.

This line helps some: Forgiveness must be practiced, for the world cannot perceive its meaning, nor provide a guide to teach you its beneficence.

If there is anyone I need to forgive for anything it is me.  I think this lesson has a lot to do with that as part of the practice session includes this:

Let me perceive forgiveness as it is.  Would I accuse myself of doing this?  I will not lay this chain upon myself.

While it's true, there was a time that I would easily blame others, find fault with others, accuse others for all manner of my own disappointments or for a given situation.  The pendulum has arced the other way and I find myself self-reflecting to identify the choices I've made to arrive in a given situation.  This is good and it's progress.  I also recognize that I can struggle with forgiving myself - I do accuse myself of things that bind me, rather than observe my feelings without judgment (and certainly if I'm judging myself, I am surely judging others). 

I understand that forgiveness does indeed take practice.  I had a couple of conversations today that included this theme - the theme of practice, doing the work, taking the steps to become more familiar with our own divinity, in 'getting it' that I am not in the world, the world is in me (and in you, in each of us).

And, by the way, what a great day to be practicing this....the day in which we honor the Law of Pure Potentiality.

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