Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Monday, March 28, 2011

Day 86 - Lesson 85

A review of lessons 69 and 70 -

(69) My grievances hide the light of the world in me.
(70) My salvation comes from me.

I wrote my response to this review late last night, after having flown eight hours.  The plane rides weren't conducive to blogging.  However, I saved my response in a Word document to paste here tonight....that document is on the computer I traveled with and not this one.  I'll have to post it tomorrow.

Today was a crazy day of leaving the place where the meditation retreat was held, shopping for home stuff, and then flying for five and then three hours.  Both plane rides were packed full which left little room for any kind of maneuvering.  On the five hour flight, a woman sat next to me and ordered, all at once, three screwdrivers.  When the beverage cart came through the second time, she ordered an additional three.  She passed out after drinking five of them.  During the drinking of them, she had this habit of flicking her fingernail against her teeth – she did this over and over again.  I was reading.  Well, I was trying to read but found myself pulled into listening to her flicking.  I took my iPod out and listened to it and continued reading, but even through that, I found myself being drawn to the flick, flick, flick sound. My immediate reaction was first to give her a ‘dirty look’ because she should have known that her behavior was irritating.  My second reaction was to tell her that she should stop doing that because it was irritating.  I also found myself judging the amount of alcohol she was drinking.  However, instead of doing these things, I took a few deep breaths; I actively thought of all of reasons I should express love from my heart to hers, from my soul to hers.  It’s funny how much better I felt.  If I had engaged her in an unkind way – I most assuredly would not have felt better.

I chose to let my light shine.  I chose to see her light.

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