Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Monday, March 7, 2011

Day 66 - Lesson 65

My only function is the one God gave me.

Today was a difficult day.  In fact, I am feeling vulnerable, sad, emotional, blue....I can't go into any real detail about it because of my professional position, but today was difficult.  I know, I know, I already said that. 

My morning routine was typical and nothing out of the norm occurred.  I went to work ready to tackle my 'to do' list and felt good about it.  However, shortly after my arrival, I met with someone who was very sick, then I met with someone who was very mad, then I met with someone who resigned, then I met with five people who lost their jobs, then I met with someone who was injured, then I met with two people who disregarded their own rules, then I met with someone who had a complaint.  I spent less than 10 minutes at home after an 11 hour day.  I went to a meeting that lasted nearly three hours and listened to one painful story, one heartbreaking injustice after another - stuff that mostly all could have been prevented.

Did I have five positive interactions for every negative one?  No, I don't think so.  I didn't, however, mention that in between several of these interactions today, I also met with loving, supportive, caring individuals.  Tonight, I met with brave, courageous, encouraging, inspiring individuals.

I maintained a calm and loving heart throughout the challenges of today's difficulties. So, even though I'm feeling kind of sad and a bit blue - I am also feeling hopeful.  I take refuge in my only God-given function.
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