I call upon God's Name and on my own.
This lesson encourages us to think of and call upon God all day. It says, in part:
Practice but this today; repeat God's Name slowly again and still again. Become oblivious to every name but His. Hear nothing else. Let all your thoughts become anchored on this. No other word we use except at the beginning, when we say today's idea but once. And then God's Name becomes our only thought, our only word, the only thing that occupies our minds, the only wish we have, the only sound with any meaning, and the only Name of everything that we desire to see; of everything that we would call our own.
Given that I already find myself thinking about God constantly, this lesson wasn't too difficult for me. It was a good day for it, too - today I honor the Law of Pure Potentiality. God is pure potential. My challenge continues to be in finding and identifying with the divine that I am. Of course, it's easy when everything feels like it's going right. When I feel out of sorts, confused, frustrated about things then it's not so easy.
I have had some old junk surface the past few days that sort of surprises me.... I keep thinking that I should be past it. Mostly I think I am, but when it comes up it does make me scratch my head. For example, the sun came out on Friday and it was a really pretty day. I left work early to take a hike. As I was outside, I thought about how good a beer would taste. That thought led to smoking a cigarette, to drinking more, to smoking more, to feeling awful - to feeling like all the progress I've made would just go right down the drain. It was like watching a really bad 'B' movie in my head. Once the reel reached it's end (no - no digital here) - I did feel bad. Why on earth would that stuff come up? I've been baffled by it and obsessed with it all weekend. The 'whys' of it all.
Anyway, the formal practice of calling upon God all day today was really helpful. I don't have any answers, but I'm trying to let it go and let it be.
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