Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Friday, July 1, 2011

Day 182 - Lesson 181

I trust my brothers, who are one with me.

This lesson addresses several themes: trust, perspective, and present moment awareness.

As I went about my day, I stayed focused on this lesson.  It was a beautiful way to release my own perceived frustrations and to really look at others with a loving heart. 

I received an email not too long ago from an incredibly special person who has felt left out of my life the past few years.  My initial gut response to this email was disbelief and defensiveness.  I just couldn't believe that this person really felt that way, and I thought of all the ways I didn't think that was true, and thought up a dozen ways this person could have felt more involved....then it dawned on me - there is absolutely no reason for me to defend my point of view.  My point of view really makes no difference.  What I needed to do was hear what this special person had to say, to feel what this person is feeling, to acknowledge this person's pain and disappointment without judgment, to love this person more than justifying or defending my own point of view.  I am now ready to respond to that email and I will respond with a sincere apology; I will ask how I can make things right.  I will reaffirm my love for this very special person.

This lesson - trust, perspective, and present moment awareness was the perfect reinforcement for me today.
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