Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Day 165 - Lesson 164

Now are we one with Him Who is our Source.

This is a powerful lesson - this part reached right out and grabbed me:

There is silence into which the world can not intrude.  There is an ancient peace you carry in your heart and have not lost.  There is a sense of holiness in you the thought of sin has never touched.  All this today you will remember.

I know I experience that silence occasionally during meditation, and often on my hikes, and sometimes when I hear a beautiful piece of music.

My day started with this lesson and meditation.  Then from 7:30 in the morning to 6:30 tonight I was engrossed in work - though there was a short time that I spent in my Perfect Health studies (a webinar).  I came to realize with more clarity that there is no denying my dosha (mind-body type).  My competitive nature burst forth this afternoon - and even though I totally recognized it, acknowledged it, and told myself how ridiculous it was....it nearly had a life of its own.  The sad thing is it's over an item that in the grand scheme of things isn't even important.  Yet, I was reluctant to rein it in.  I am slightly embarrassed by this.  Difficult to recognize anything 'holy' in me when these kinds of things happen.  I suppose the thing to do is stop judging it and let it go.  Anyway, then I ran to the grocery store to prepare for tomorrow night's goddess gathering (the strawberry moon).  Finally, I went for my hike.  The hike was such a healthy way to release the negative energy I was holding onto.  I was able to breathe deep, to feel the muscles in my thighs, to sing, and to explore.

It was nice, at the end of my day, to reflect more deeply again upon this lesson.  Acknowledging the ancient peace within me is an amazing experience.  Remember this.....breathe it - soak it in.

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