Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Friday, February 4, 2011

Day 35 - Lesson 34

I could see peace instead of this.  This was such a helpful 'mantra' today.  I repeated it over and over - sometimes looking externally and other times internally.  At one point today, I was tempted to 'see red.'  Thanks to this reminder, I didn't.  When I began to feel that old sensation of tension, that rising flare of anger, that temptation to lash out - I didn't.  I closed my eyes for a few brief seconds and said, "I could see peace instead of this."  While the situation continued to be disappointing, it no longer owned me, I wasn't defined by it, it wasn't a reflection of me.  A deep sense of comfort washed over me.  I chose to see peace and I chose to respond in loving-kindness.  This is progress.
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