Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Day 333 - Lesson 332

Fear binds the world.  Forgiveness sets it free.

This lesson starts out by saying:

The ego makes illusions.  Truth undoes its evil dreams by shining them away.  Truth never makes attack.  It merely is.  And by its presence is the mind recalled from fantasies, awaking to the real.

It goes on to say much more and makes so much sense.  In fact, it dawned on me today as I was getting frustrated with a decision that hadn't been made.  A decision I was waiting on so I could make a decision.  I was actually starting to feel some anger and frustration that I realized I was holding onto.  I cursed, clenched my jaw, I was thinking, "Grrr (well, insert curse word), this is really ticking me off - this needs to happen so I can make my arrangements."  This is when the light went on....there was no one to be angry with, everything is going to work out, maybe not in exactly the way I had mapped out and maybe not in exactly the time line I had planned, but it is all going to work.  I made my arrangements, made plans given the information we have, and worked with all interested parties towards the common goal.  Aahhh, yep, that felt so much better.  Like a weight taken off my chest.

Once I released my, my, my, me, me, me and focused on the common goal things began to fall into place. While I was constricted with frustration (insert fear) I couldn't see how things were going to work out.

Release fear - forgive and be set free.

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