Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Day 253 - Lesson 252

The Son of God is my Identity.

This lesson begins by saying, "My Self is holy beyond all the thoughts of holiness of which I now conceive.  Its shimmering and perfect purity is far more brilliant than is any light that I have ever looked upon."

Traveling and being out of my regular routine makes it all the more difficult to see myself as holy.  It's comforting to know that I am holy.  I look forward to the day when I can more easily tap into that feeling no matter what my environment is at any given time.  Meditation does definitely make all the difference.  I have a much calmer heart and mind.  However, I do notice old patterns surfacing in certain environments and around certain people.  Practicing present moment awareness has been helpful to recognize the surfacing patterns and make the necessary adjustments.  It's a bit unsettling because I was feeling like I had this amazing sense of peace that nothing could shake - and then some of the seemingly smallest and simpler situations conjure up old feelings and then old patterns.

I am going to breathe deep, embrace the present, and let go of my internal disappointment.  I am going to thank God and thank pure potential for all of the wonderful and infinite possibilities in life.  I don't know what's around the next corner, but I do know that I am worthy of being loved, I am loved, and I am exactly where the universe intends me to be in this very moment.
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