Why this? Why now?

I have given a great deal of thought to whether or not a blog is right for me. I have been on an amazing journey - some of it very sad, some of it profoundly joyful. Transformation is possible - I know because it is happening with me.

I can't say for sure when it all started, other than it started happening with tremendous regularity upon my 40th birthday. This may be a rather normal occurence - you reach a certain age and start wondering if this is all there is in life. Am I doing what I'm meant to be doing? Are my beliefs real - what are my beliefs exactly?

Here's a smattering of the journey -

I got a divorce and began to discover and explore life from a much different perspective.

I began thinking about my health and researching and reaching out to learn things like: what I should be doing to avoid heart disease. The book, The China Study, changed my life. I am now a vegetarian. This also led me to quit smoking....and finally to stop drinking, too (I don't care what the studies say - just eat the grapes instead).

I have embarked upon an incredible spiritual journey - from a comparative religions class, to studying Ayurvedic living (of which I'm now studying to become an instructor), to learning more about Buddhism, and, as documented here in my blog, an active study of A Course In Miracles.

I am in a place in my life where I finally recognize very consciously that what I put in my mind and in my body is what comes out. As I am reminded most days when listening to Deepak Chopra's soul affirmations, "My body is the garden of my soul."

May I be of vessel of spirit, of loving-compassion.

Yes, I do think a blog is right for me. Thank you for joining me.
Namaste,

mac

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Day 127 - Lesson 126

All that I give is given to myself.

The main point of this lesson is:

Today we understand the truth that giver and reciever are the same.

I've had an incredibly busy day and I'm incredibly tired.  I had a lot of opportunities to give and to receive. 

I am thankful for this beautiful day and for this beautiful lesson.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Day 126 - Lesson 125

In quiet I receive God's Word today.

While flying for three hours today, I spent a lot of time in reflection and meditation in this lesson. 

Today He speaks to you.  His Voice awaits your silence, for His Word can not be heard until your mind is quiet for a while, and meaningless desires have been stilled.  Await His Word in quiet.  There is peace within you to be called upon today, to help make ready your most holy mind to hear the Voice for its Creator speak.

About a year ago, as I was starting my practice of daily meditation, I remember feeling restless and wondering if I would ever feel a sense of peace.  After being instructed in the Primordial Sound meditation technique, I learned that each meditation is different and valuable.  The important thing to remember is that when my mind is quiet, when I sit in silence, I come to know my true self. 

It's true that meditation provides a genuine avenue to listen to God.  I heard God today and I am ever thankful.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Day 125 - Lesson 124

Let me remember I am one with God.

I especially love this part of this lesson: Our shining footprints point the way to truth, for God is our Companion as we walk the world a little while.  And those who come to follow us will recognize the way because the light we carry stays behind, yet still remains with us as we walk on.

That creates such a beautiful visual.  I find that one of the greatest benefits of this journey is that I don't take things as personally anymore and I have a great deal more trust that things will always work out for the best - as they are meant to work out.  I can't describe how surprising and comforting this is.  A couple of times this week I had people apologize to me for things they were afraid I might have been offended by.  Each time I was really taken off guard because I hadn't been offended by anything.  It was never all that easy to offend me, but I would get irritated and take things personally as if I was somehow superior, or whatever had happened was somehow directed towards me - at me.  I see now that the way other people behave has nothing to do with me.  Like Wayne Dyer says, "How people treat me is their karma, how I react is mine."

Living this stuff every day, asking every single day to be an instrument of love, taking the steps, and being mindful has created the most peaceful existence I have ever had, and, in fact, struggled to imagine at one time. 

Yes, please let me remember I am one with God.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Day 124 - Lesson 123

I thank my Father for His gifts to me.

I had one of those, "Oh, my goodness where has the day gone!" days.  I realized that, while I may not want to be in this line of work much longer, I am thankful to have days that fly by.  Days in which loads of good things get accomplished.  There were a couple of disappointments and one situation that I had to tell myself over and over that I didn't need to defend my point of view. Though, overall, it was a day that I can reflect upon and feel good about.

This lesson encouraged a day filled with thankfulness to Father, to God, to Source, to Love.  A nice lesson for a day committed to the Law of Least Effort.  

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Day 123 - Lesson 122

Forgiveness offers everything I want.

The mantra that was repeated with this lesson:

Forgiveness offers everything I want.
Today I have accepted this as true.
Today I have received the gifts of God.

This was helpful for me in a challenging situation today. A decision needs to be made.  A decision that requires a recommendation from me.  Even after prayer, meditation, and asking myself over and over again, "What would Love do?" I still don't have a very good recommendation.  I had been beating myself up over this.  I gave in today.  I turned it over to Source.  I forgave myself.  I see now that the situation will resolve as it's meant to and I've done all I can do. 

Getting to forgiveness isn't always easy - sometimes I make things more complicated than they need to be - but once I get there it feels right.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Day 122 - Lesson 121

Forgiveness is the key to happiness.

This lesson addresses so well:
The unforgiving mind is full of fear, and offers love no room to be itself; no place where it can spread its wings in peace and soar above the turmoil of the world.  The unforgiving mind is sad, without the hope of respite and release from pain.  It suffers and abides in misery, peering about in darkness, seeing not, yet certain of the danger lurking there.

The practice periods for this lesson included thinking about someone you dislike and someone you love.  As you think about and see the person you dislike, you look for some 'light' in him.  You see your friend, the person you love, and the light is clear.  You then work to combine the two. This, of course, encourages you to see love in those we don't like.  To see ourselves in each other.

I think these kinds of exercises are always good.  They remind me not to take things personally, to keep my ego in check. To recognize that just because I feel a certain way about how I think someone has treated me and why I think they may have treated me a certain way - that I really don't have any idea.  I don't know what's happening in someone else's head.  I don't know that they've done anything intentionally.  And, frankly, if they have it's up to me completely whether or not I let it bother me.

When I choose forgiveness I choose love, and when I choose love I choose peace.  And this is the perfect recipe for happiness.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Day 121 - Lesson 120

Review -

109 - I rest in God.
110 - I am as God created me.

I spent a fair amount of time reflecting upon these lessons today.  During my hike, especially.  It was blustery and chilly and my hike felt intense because it's one that I've completed only once this season.  I thought about a confusing issue involving a friend.  As I was shopping for supper tonight, I had a discussion with another friend who was angry about situation.  After supper the news was blaring about the U.S. finally killing Osama Bin Laden.

Thankfully, I was able to rest in God and recognize that I am as God created me - on this day of pure potentiality.

Through this thought, this reflection, I see that the confusing situation with my friend, my other friend's anger, and the death of Osama Bin Laden that true resolution, real resolution, lasting resolution is not possible where love is not present.

May my heart, may your heart be filled with love - even when that feels like a difficult proposition.  In fact, it is in those difficult moments that love is absolutely critical.  We heal, we mend, we find peace when we love.  Albert Einstein has a famous quote that sums this up, it goes something like this:

It is impossible to solve a problem on the same level that it was created.